I'm quite sure I've annoyed my mil over the years, but it's mainly for doing the unthinkable thing of not being who she expects me to be.....black, rich and adoring her. I can't be black, I haven't been able to win that lottery yet and I know her too well to adore anything about her. But it does give me a pausing moment to really think about the dilemma my husband is in because of the two of us. Does he defend the woman who brought him life? Or does he defend the woman he chose to share that life with? Or does he sit on his hands and hope it goes away? lol.
Her ability to never discuss anything but surface stuff is a huge barrier to getting through any obstacles in her relationships with other people. I can actually step out of the situation and see that she has these issues with pretty much everyone. It's her fault and not her fault at the same time. She has an unhealthy relationship that she knows is not right, but she's stuck in the hopeful dream state of what could happen if or when. With that being said, she quite the woman in her own right but she doesn't seem to realize her own success. Sad, right? She would be mortified to know the pity I feel for her. Pity, not sympathy. Every situation is what you make it to be.
I wish her the best. I hope my husband figures out a way to let them get close and be more of a family. I'm not sure if she'll let it happen, but I want him to know that he did the best by his mother. Maybe someday she'll see him for the man he's made of himself. That's not something either of us did.....he did that and he deserves the credit for it alone.